Thursday, September 06, 2007

Ted Was On That Dickbag's Radio Show!

Since I'm a total masochist and had some time to kill between 5 and 6 pm tonight, I decided to once again listen to the horrific Chuck Morse radio hour of shame (Last night he had a guy on who said that "recreational sex" is worse for you than smoking! Awesome!). Imagine my joy when my favorite other crazy idiot was on the show: Ted DeSalvatore!

Ted didn't get the whole hour, of course. The first 15 minutes or so were filled with some Moonie guy from the Washington Times rambling about how Democrats are all horribly corrupt and Republicans are the party of "values" and the media is controlled by liberal Jews and so forth. He had a little lovefest with the ultra-conservative "slightly right of center" host and then went back to from whence he came. I passed the time playing Advance Wars and mostly ignoring the windbaggery.

Then Ted came on and I couldn't ignore it anymore. I'll say one thing for the man; he has a buttery-smooth radio voice. Like those morning DJs who push the fart sound button every 15 seconds and make you want to drive your car at full speed into a telephone pole.

So what did he say?

Beats me, I didn't take notes and it was mostly the same crap he says all the time. Slumlords were mentioned. Cleaning stuff up was mentioned. Unitil was talked about a bit. Then, in an uncharacteristic bit of journalistic integrity, the host also asked about Ted's financial backers!

Let me recreate for you from memory the way that conversation went. This is not a literal transcription, but should give you the gist. Let's call it a "re-imagining", like that horrible Tim Burton remake of "Planet of the Apes"...

"So what does this all cost, and who's backing you?"
Ted: "It's a grassroots thing, I have a treasurer who knows about that stuff."
Host: "You have to tell people, you know. It's the law."
Ted: "Not for ten days I don't! Neener neener neener!"
Host: "I love you Ted! You're a visionary!"

There was a similar exchange over Unitil. This time Ray C. got involved. Again dramatized for your pleasure:

Ted: "I'm going to get a bunch of mayors together and go tell the state to make Unitil lower costs or something."
Host: "Why do you have to be mayor to do that?"
Ted: "Because nobody listens to me now!"
Ray C.: "Couldn't somebody have done that in the past if it would work? It's not like the state regulatory commission is a new thing, and we've always had state reps who could help."
Ted: "I dunno."
Ray C.: "Your plan kind of sucks, doesn't it?"
Ted: "I'm a fighter!"
Host: "I want to have your children, Ted!"

I sort of like Ray C.

Ted also described his role as mayor as being a big "cheerleader" for the city. That's Ted "We need to focus on what’s bad" DeSalvatore for you!

Man, talk radio sucks.


Email update:

Still no response to my email to DeSalvatore. Do other people have this problem too? Should I not have signed it "The Unicow"?

I humbly request the help of you, the Progressive Fitchburg readers. If you could, please take a moment to email Ted at either or and ask the simple question "Where do you do your teaching?" You're welcome (and encouraged) to add more to the body of the email than just that, but please make sure to be respectful.

Seriously, this is a question that really should be answered. If anyone actually manages to get an answer out of him, you can either leave a comment or forward it to me at It would also be nice to hear from you if you try but don't get a response. Unless Ted's trying to hide something, somebody ought to get an answer!

Thanks for the help!


JustSayNoToDeSalvo said...

"The first 15 minutes or so were filled with some Moonie guy from the Washington Times rambling about how Democrats are all horribly corrupt and Republicans are the party of "values" and the media is controlled by liberal Jews and so forth."

So much for making Fitchburg a "No Place For Hate" city. Didn't someone already try that shit in Europe a few decades ago?

Pretty fitting content to precede the DeSalvo song and dance.

RomanAedile said...

Ted in that photo looks like he stopped at Burger King and had one of those burgers that makes your mustache grow, you know from the comercials with the King. By the way the Ted is way more creepy than the Burger King guy.

If Ted becomes mayor Unitil will raise our rates just to punish us and because it will confirm we are rubes.

The Unicow said...

In fairness, I don't think he actually mentioned Jews.

But pretty much any time someone from the Washington Times talks about "the liberal media" I assume they're actually thinking "the liberal Jew-run media". They've just learned not to say it out loud.

The Unicow said...

Hamburgers make your mustache grow?

Stupid beef hormones!

JustSayNoToDeSalvo said...

the unicow said ... >>They've just learned not to say it out loud. <<

That's more than DeSalvo can claim.

fitchburg-shuffle said...

I can't believe he claimed to be a "cheerleader" for Fitchburg.

I'm yet to read any article with Ted mentioning a positive about Fitchburg. He just wants to bash the city.

The flip-flopping continues....

ReallyRachel said...

Unicow, you make me laugh. It's a good thing as Martha Stewart says!

A plug for the kinder, gentler blog (peaceful doesn't have to be boring) ... Besides Tom Donnelly, we've received guest articles from Kevin Star (Ward 4 hopeful), Shaun Cormier (At Large Hopeful), and the latest in the mayoral candidate articles, Lisa Wong. Lisa's article provides some specifics and direction.

Perhaps perspective is skewed from the one negative campaign, but the folks who are working so hard to keep things on the up and up have really risen to the challenge.

Maybe that's the one thing we have to thank Ted for - contrast.

Anyway, hope you'll take a look and as always, click that Back button to PF.

Happy New Year to your Jewish readers.


TforTyler said...

Ted is nothing but a brainwasher!

Chucky Morse did a disservice to the community by not asking about his qualification.

Hey, him and his wife were at the firefighter dedication yesterday. Noone but him and his wife wore campaign paraphenalias. Campaigning at a dedication for a fallen firefighter was inappropriate, disrespectful and disgusting!

Nowoco said...

Frankly the more time we all spend bashing Ted, the more energized his "base" will get. that's pretty appalling about showing up at the funeral w/campaign stuff. I heard about the other council candidate showing up at the funeral of someone he didn't know, which is just as rude.

JustSayNoToDeSalvo said...

You've all heard of the great unwashed masses. In DeSalvo's case, they're the great brainwashed.

What is truly appalling is that there are actually people in the city of Fitchburg who do not mind that he is a racist, bigot, homophobe, that he uses derogatory terms about almost everyone he comes into contact with. What is REALLY super apalling is that there are a few cops in his corner, who are of course there because he's promised them promotions.

Outside of Fitchburg this guy is such a big joke that people are actually incredulous that anyone would even let him put up a yard sign.

But then look at Koresh, Jones and others. Fanatics have a way of finding a following. Let's just hope that most of Fitchburg is awake on election day.

There's a Level 3 sex offender in residence near where a friend lives. Imagine my surprise when I went to visit and saw a DeSalvatore sign in the guy's yard.

I guess people are only scum if they don't support DeSalvo.

fitchburg-shuffle said...

Remember, if you don't support Ted, you are the enemy!

How come nobody brings up the fact that this guy offered a local bartender cash for dirt on other public officials? Does he know that something damaging in his past will come out and he needs to return fire?

The shit storm should begin soon!

ReallyRachel said...

Well the whole town - ok much of the city - is talking about the disrespect shown a the Belliveau dedication ceremony by DeSalvatore and his wife. Not only were the two of them the only ones wearing campaign advertising, DeSalvatore had the lack of class to park his big sign in front of Slattery's where they went afterward.

Can you imagine having such an uncaring, unfeeling, narcissistic CLASSLESS individual as your mayor?

To detract from a long-overdue event to honor a public servant who made the ultimate sacrifice for our safety is a disgrace. For a mayoral candidate to do so is totally unbecoming, and an insult.

This creep has harassed, abused, badmouthed, attacked, maligned, stalked, and just generally made the mainstream citizens, neighbors included, miserable since he slunk into town towing his cardboard boxes behind him in his little trailer.

Unicow, please write a new article and change out that picture soon. I love the commentary, but honestly I want to puke when I come to PF lately.

Just two more weeks and we'll be free of this parasite!